Hey Reddit, I’m a 17-year-old guy currently staying with my grandma because my parents told me I’m not living with them anymore. Now, they’re upset that I won’t help out at their house, but I don’t think I owe them that. Here’s what happened:
A couple of weeks ago, I came out as gay to my parents. Their reaction wasn’t great—my mom cried, and my dad just looked disappointed. They said they loved me but needed time to process. Afterward, things at home became super tense.
Suddenly, everything I did seemed to annoy them. If I didn’t immediately do the dishes or take out the trash, they’d get mad. My mom started saying things like, “You need to learn responsibility,” and my dad kept reminding me, “This is part of being in a family.” It felt like they were just looking for excuses to criticize me.
The breaking point came last week when my mom asked me to vacuum the living room. I told her I’d do it later because I was busy, but she insisted it needed to be done right away. Frustrated, I told her, “Why does it matter? No one’s coming over.” That set her off. She started yelling about how I never help out or respect her. My dad jumped in, accusing me of having an “attitude problem” and not pulling my weight.
I snapped and said, “Maybe I’d want to help if you didn’t make everything about how much I disappoint you.” My dad lost it and said, “If you can’t follow our rules, you’re not living with us anymore.” I thought it was just an angry comment, but my mom immediately started packing my stuff, saying I should go stay with my grandma until I “learn how to be part of a family.”
So now I’m living with my grandma, who’s been kind but keeps urging me to apologize. Meanwhile, my parents have been texting constantly, asking for my help with things like babysitting my little brother, mowing the lawn, or helping my dad with a garage project.
I told them no because they’re the ones who kicked me out. My mom called me selfish and said, “We’re still your parents, and you need to step up when we need you.” I replied, “If you needed my help so badly, maybe you shouldn’t have kicked me out.” She hung up, and now my grandma says I’m being “disrespectful.”
I don’t think I’m wrong here. They made it clear I’m no longer part of the household, so why should I act like I am?
AITA?